Tomas Archives (TOP SECRET): Madrigals in Alaska

To: Tomas Leadership From: Gunnar Kaasen Subject: The eagle has landed February 2, 1925 TOP SECRET I barely made it to Nome alive, but I am proud to report that the Clue is in a safe location here in town. The medicine that was needed also made it. The trip was treacherous and we were followed most of the way. At one point, we almost lost the medicine and the Clue in a blizzard outside Shaktoolik. Somehow we survived. I don’t think the men following us were as lucky. Before the Clue got to me, Wild Bill Shannon cabled me in code to say someone was tailing him when he set out from Nenana on the 27th. He said the men had all-black furs and black sleds. Once the relay started, several of the mushers also mentioned they thought they saw black figures closing in on them from behind, but in the constant whiteout of the blizzard they couldn’t be sure. It was Leonhard Seppala who finally spotted them for certain. Recognizing that they looked like Madrigals, he pushed his dog team to the limit, traveling across 90 miles of snow and ice at breakneck speed. He took an unsafe and unexpected detour through the Norton Sound to throw off his pursuers. He knew their heavier teams would break the ice, and he was right. As his sled climbed over a hill, he said he saw the dark figures fall into the glacial waters he had safely crossed just hours before. Without the courage and willpower of these men and dogs, it’s likely the Clue would have fallen into Madrigal hands. It’s times like these that make me proudest of being a Tomas Gunnar

Polo Chaos
By James Hollingsworth

Yesterday’s match against Griffiths College was full of surprises. The crowd was larger than usual as many students were curious to see Ian Kabra’s new ponies. He recently imported three new mounts from Argentina. A few minutes before throw-in, Kabra trotted out on the field while chatting on his mobile phone. Two girls tried to pet the pony, but Kabra snapped, “Get your hands off him!” The pony grew restless and began to toss his head as Kabra continued his conversation. In an act of questionable horsemanship, Kabra yanked the reins and shouted, “quit it, you stupid brute.”

However, Kabra’s performance on the field was spotless, and he scored two goals during the first chukker. The only Griffiths player who could keep up with Kabra was their captain, Nicholas Ryder, but even Ryder’s mount was no match for Kabra’s speedy import. There was a group of girls who cheered and waved every time Kabra rode by, but he ignored them.

By the beginning of the exciting sixth chukker, The Flyte School and Griffiths College were tied. With three minutes to go, Kabra and Ryder were galloping towards the ball when a strange noise distracted the players and the fans. Everyone looked up to watch a helicopter descend towards the field. While the umpires were distracted, Kabra swung his stick but, instead of aiming for the ball, he aimed for Ryder’s ankle.

By the time the umpires finally called a time-out, Kabra had dismounted and given his pony to his private groom. His sister, Natalie, was standing next to the helicopter, urgently beckoning Kabra to join her. Kabra turned to his stunned teammates and said, “Ryder’s old ankle injury is acting up. We’ve won if you don’t muck it up.”

When one of Kabra’s stunned teammates asked where he was going, he replied, “Family business in Venice.” Kabra then climbed into the helicopter and took off, leaving his teammates confused and their ponies half frightened to death by the noise.

Final Score: The Flyte School 4, Griffiths College 3

Pages from Grace Cahill's Notebook

Tomas Archives: Eisenhower Holt’s report

To: Tomas Leadership
From: Eisenhower Holt
Subject: Grace Cahill’s funeral August 21, 2008

Score! Team Holt is already leading the competition. I know some people didn’t think I was the right man for the job. But the Holts were among the only Tomas invited to the will reading. Old lady Cahill must have had an eye for real talent. (Not like some members of the Tomas leadership. Take that, Ronald!)

Before we watched them put the old hag in the ground, I let Madison and Reagan play with Dan and Amy for a bit. They turned Dan upside down, but nothing interesting fell out of his pockets.

After the funeral, the “chosen few” went into the house for the will reading. That skinny lawyer played a creepy video of Grace. I told you she was up to something! She blabbered on about the competition and said we all had to choose between a million dollars and a Clue. Team Holt lost no time arguing. We took the Clue! And we didn’t waste time changing out of civilian funeral clothes before we dispatched. I knew it was a good idea to wear our tracksuits!

As ordered, I didn’t let those Cahill brats out of my sight. I’m sure the old witch told them everything about the Clues, so I ordered my team to follow them. Those little Cahill weaklings wouldn’t have a chance on their own. They’re as pathetic as their loser father, Arthur Trent. We were at West Point together. He always laughed at my answers in class. But I had the last laugh!

We marched in formation to follow Grace’s little pets to the library. We watched them go into a secret room, but Team Holt waited outside. Books make me dizzy and I needed to stay alert! I made the kids jog in place for about 20 minutes as we planned our next move. We wanted to smoke them out of their hiding spot, but Hamilton got a little too excited with the lighter fluid. So the house burned down. No big loss. What good is a mansion without a weight room?! Some people have no taste.

We’ll continue to follow the Cahills. The Holts will not be outsmarted by a team that doesn’t even wear matching uniforms!

Lucian Tools (Black book of buried secrets)

POISON-DELIVERY MECHANISMS
Poison Rings
Poison Fingernails
Poison Darts
Poison Cuff Links
Poison Teddy Bears
Poison Umbrellas

WEOPONS
Daggers
Retractable Knives
Walking-stick Swords
Bullet Pens

TRANSPORTATION
The Shark
Bulletproof Limousine
Advanced Fighter Jets
Speed Yachts (With Helipads)

COMMUNICATION
Codes
Surveillance bugs
Untraceable Cell Phones
Polygraphs

Lucian Archives (Tracking Grace Cahill)

To: Lucian Leadership
From: Arkady Protopopov, Transportation Coordinator
Subject: Transportation Report on Grace Cahill/Request for Funds

May 7, 1983

Our operatives have been trailing Grace Cahill constantly for the past two years. In April '81 we spotted her small plane on our radar screens as she left Madagascar from a secret airstrip on the central plateau. We traced her to Tunisia, where she ditched the plane and crossed the Sahara on a camel. She resurfaced on a speedboat in the Adriatic Sea, landing in Split and heading from there by train through Eastern Europe to Leningrad. After several days of chasing Russian taxis over the canals of that city, we picked her up again in Moscow, where she boarded the Trans-Siberian Railroad headed east. She was next spotted crossing the Siberian steppes on a snowmobile. She took a helicopter over the Bering Strait to Alaska, headed south by dogsled to Kodiak, where she boarded a tanker bound for Hawaii. As of this morning, she is surfing off Oahu. I wouldn't be surprised if she took the Space Shuttle to Venus next. The woman changes modes of transportation more often than she changes clothes.

The Lucian Supply Office should be aware that in order to continue tracking Grace Cahill at this rate, our agents will need access to the following vehicles:

Light aircraft
Gliders
Helicopters
Jeeps
Snowmobiles
Horses
Camels
Dogsleds (and dogs)
Hot air balloons
Amphibious vehicles
Speedboats and water skis
Motorized surfboards
Downhill skis (and appropriate skiwear)

We are also requesting additional funding to cover unexpected expenses, such as camel food. Grace Cahill can't outlast us forever—we're Lucians, after all—but an infusion of cash would be a big help. It's all very well for the Leadership to lunch on caviar every day, but your agents in the field are suffering for want of necessities like sunscreen, boating shoes, and fashionable driving gloves. Thank you.

Harry Houdini

Early Life
Erik Weisz—who would later rename himself Harry Houdini—was born in Budapest, Hungary, in 1874. When he was 4 years old, his family moved to America, and his name was written as “Ehrich Weiss” on the immigration papers.

Ehrich, called “Ehrie” or “Harry” by his friends, made his show business debut at 10, performing a trapeze act as “Ehrich, the Prince of the Air.” He later began performing magic tricks in New York’s Coney Island as Houdini. He chose the name in honor of his idol, the great French magician Robert-Houdin. Houdini found greater success performing escape acts, mainly from handcuffs and straitjackets. In Coney Island, he met his wife, Bess, who acted as his stage assistant for the rest of his career.

No one’s sure exactly why Houdini switched from magic acts to escape acts. Most people assume that it was for the money. Escape acts were much more popular than the tamer illusions. Some psychologists have suggested a subconscious urge to constantly “escape.” Others note that Houdini’s main talent was picking locks and argue that he was training to break in somewhere secret. What are you talking about?

Escapes

In 1900, Houdini toured Europe. In Moscow, he escaped from a prison van en route to Siberia. Houdini was particularly interested in learning how to break out of Russian custody. Some of his friends joked that he must have been looking for some long-lost Russian treasure! Where did you get this information? It’s true!

When he wasn’t busy fooling foreign authorities, Houdini perfected tricks like his famous milk can escape. A circular milk can was filled with water. Houdini got in, and the lid was chained down. This act evolved into Houdini’s most famous trick, the Chinese Water Torture Cell. The cell was basically a water-filled phone booth, and after being bound and handcuffed, Houdini was hung in it upside down. He always escaped and performed the trick from 1912 until his death in 1926.

Other Interests

One of the earliest pilots, Houdini was the first person to fly over Australia and land without crashing. Though he said he would be flying his plane from city to city for his next tour, he never got into it again. There has been some speculation that Houdini was looking for something on the Australian outback, which he must have found. Why he never flew again is a mystery that died with Houdini.

Death

Houdini died of a ruptured appendix on October 31, 1926. It was said that he could withstand any blow, and a Canadian university student punched him repeatedly in the stomach with no warning. Houdini’s death was no accident. That thug was paid to beat him up! No way. Why would anyone want to kill a harmless magician? He was too good at escaping. He could break in and out of anywhere. No secret was safe from him.

Houdini refused medical treatment and continued to travel, in considerable pain. He died of acute appendicitis in Detroit at age 52, though his appendix would have likely burst without the blows anyway. Yeah, right. He was buried in Machpelah Cemetery in Queens, New York.